X hits the spot

by Chris Ridire

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    Handmade limited run of my first album, X hits the spot, adorned in duct tape and permanent marker. Due to personal circumstances (living halfway up a mountain), cassettes will be posted out as and when I can. That said, I will endeavour to send them out as soon as I can and I promise I will always send them within a week of getting the order.

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This record was made at my parents' house in Co. Wexford, Ireland in the summer of 2013.


released September 3, 2013

Chris Ridire - Gach rud.



all rights reserved


Chris Ridire Cardiff, UK

Chris Ridire is a lo-fi singer/songwriter from Wexford, Ireland, currently based in Cardiff, UK.

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Track Name: Lunatic High
I took my clock apart,
I like to see how things work,
I was very careful,
I labelled every part,
Laid them out all straight,
Checked them in the light,
I counted them all up,
Made myself a list,

Sketched a few choice parts,
The ones that looked most pleasing,
I could never draw the screws right,
The thread always catches me out.

I check the radio,
For a voice sent from the Heavens,
I check every frequency,
Every hour; on the hour,
Homemade AM deal,
9v Battery,
I didn’t use a diagram,
Built from memory,
Track Name: Pulling my teeth out with pliers
It’s only twelve steps,
From here to the door,
Then to the tool shed,
Is another thirty-two more,
There’s a box of old tools,
That I don’t use anymore,
I find a rusty pair of pliers,
This time it’s “once and for all”,

I need my anaesthetic,
My magical cure-all,
My hidden, secret elixir,
Amongst the motor oil,

Copper taste in my mouth,
I look for the mirror,
I’m a goofy, gappy fucker,
Homemade MacGyver Hero,

I need my anaesthetic,
My magical cure-all,
My hidden, secret elixir,
To face the world at all,

A bottle in the hand is always worth two in the bush,
And I don’t have a problem- a disposition at a push,
And I don’t need a dentist when I’ve got what I got,
Cause I’m the guy who always has the right tool for the job,
I don’t feel I need to give myself up to a higher power,
The only time I call for God is when he’s making shit turn sour,
And I don’t need my daughter’s love to feel like a fucking human,
Track Name: Hick Source
It’s usually around seven,
I start itching from inside,
Clammy hands get the jitters,
And that’s when I decide,
I head on down to the bar,
Jack ‘n’ coke- no ice,
I only pause briefly,
Before I’m gone for the night,

I hit it.

I always wake with some bruise,
No recollection of the night,
Peel myself off the couch,
My room spins into sight.
I dread going into town,
Finding out what I’ve done,
I can’t remember the last time,
I spent morning doing anything but apologizing.
Track Name: I am going nowhere
Can you take me in town?
I want to post a letter,
I have to go sign on,
And chat about the weather,

I know it’s not ideal,
But there’s not much I can do,
A real catch-22,

I’m scared the big city,
Of being there on my own,
Of letting it swallow me up,
And missing my home.

It’s an uphill struggle,
A marathon not a sprint.
Track Name: Don't be a hero
Joshua, I wish I held you more,
I never had the guts to tell you how I feel,
‘Cause I’m so proud of the man you’ve become,
And so ashamed of the man I’ve always been,

I was never good with words

Quiet now, don’t want to wake the dog,
The sun is almost up and you’ll notice that I’m gone,
Marianne, I’ve always let you down,
I never kept control,
I hate myself for what I did to you,
Track Name: King of all I see
I am the King!
The King of all I see,
Everything I know,
It all belongs to me,
I rule the land,
Rule the skies and the sea,
Everything God made,
It all belongs to me,
I own the Sun,
The Moon and all the stars,
Every single mountain,
And every speck of dust,
I own the air,
Only I can breathe,
Every other creature,
Is stealing from me,
Is stealing my life experiences.
Track Name: Respectable Citizen
I always double my measures,
It’s the measure of a man,
How well you hold your drink,
With that tremor in your hand,

I really couldn’t care any less,
I’ve heard it all; I don’t need your damn help,

I am a respectable citizen,
Paid my taxes; paid my dues,

There’s nothing wrong with me,
I’m just blowing off some steam,
Track Name: She said I was never spontaneous
She said that I am not,
That I was never spontaneous...
Track Name: Hospital Food
I know I’ve really fucked up this time,
The cat’s out of the bag,
And I’m pissing through a straw,
They’re saying a whole lot of shit,
That I don’t understand,
And they want me to see a shrink,

I told them there’s nothing wrong,
They told me to wait and see,
They just don’t understand,
See they all kept their jobs,
And their golf club memberships,
Their Beamers, Audis and Saabs,
And I get shit.

The sterile walls are closing in,
I feel disease soak through my skin,
And I’m too weak to up-and-leave,
I feel the bastards watching me,

I can’t stand this hospital food,
It really tastes like shit,
And they never give you enough,

And this guy on my ward,
Has emphysema,
From grafting in the mines,
They’ll never know what that’s like,
Track Name: Fanfare for the retired clown
Coco wakes up in a humid haze,
In the wee small hours of the afternoon,
Daytime TV pulls him into a daze,
And he surrender’s his attention to the auction room,
Propped up on coffee and microwave meals,
Nicotine stains on the Memory Reel,
He follows his programs with religious zeal,
But all he’s waiting for,

A Fanfare for the Retired Clown!

Coco is frozen in permanent malaise,
He hasn’t seen another person for days,
He just gets by with his means and his ways,
And bothers no one else.
Track Name: Sink
I see lightning in your eyes,
I know I’ve gone too far this time,
At least I can still recognise,
The blurry lines that make your face,
It always starts with a glass of wine,
Then pulling punches at closing time,
Sirens pierce the inky night,
And cut through my daze,
Track Name: There are people living inside the Earth
I always miss the point,
The subtext in your speech,
Can’t read between the lines,
It’s always lost on me.

And I miss the days where we could talk for hours,
I bought flowers,
I was so convinced by your supernatural powers,
It’s was ours,
To keep secret,

I guess you didn’t care,
When you found out how I am,
I didn’t want to burden you,
I didn’t want to be your stigma,

There are people living inside the Earth,
I will find them,
I will join them,
And they live self-sufficiently,
I want to be,
Part of their family,

There is nothing here,
But bric-a-brac,
And broken knick-knacks,
I want to leave it all behind,
Start a new life